im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
