What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
