Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Randomize
