My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
