He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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