Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
