I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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