It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
