You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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