She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
two words...techno handjob
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
