You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
