Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
