what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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