Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
