i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
