it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
