Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Randomize