It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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