was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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