YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
