And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
