From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Randomize
