You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
