She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
