Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I wish I only lived at night.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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