if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Will exercising make me less horny?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize