either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
