Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
