I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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