we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
