This girl is more easily done than said...
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
