I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
