Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
The Olympian is in my bed
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize