lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Is this like a preordered booty call?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize