The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
