Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
it hurts more in the daytime
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
