Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
