is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
