if i can run in heels then i can drive
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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