I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
