Have you finally orgasmed yet?
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
