Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
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