I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
