It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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