Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize