I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize