i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
They took my balls.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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