JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Randomize
