Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
