yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
