who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
i think my cat just said my name.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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